| The Joy of Service |
Chapter 8 |
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In the minds of many persons who really need help, there is a repugnance to being helped which makes is difficult to do anything for them. They deem it inconsistent with a fine spirit of manliness to accept help from any one. It is a noble spirit in them which inclines them to want to live thus independently, although it may assert itself too energetically. The spirit of love, which seeks to minister rather than to be ministered unto, to give rather than to receive help, should not obstinately refuse to accept all kindnesses. It should allow others the privilege it prizes so highly and seeks so earnestly for itself. Jesus, while living to serve, did not reject the service of love which His friends were so glad to render to Him. He did not decline the ministry of the women friends who followed Him from Galilee, devoting their means to providing for His wants. He accepted the hospitality of Martha and Mary and others with grateful spirit. Even if the service offered to Him was of small value, He yet received it in such a way as not to disappoint or hurt the heart which had prompted it.
It is not a beautiful spirit, therefore, which rejects all favours, and refuses to give others the pleasure of ministering to us. We should be willing to receive as well as give. When love or gratitude is eager to do something for us to express its feeling, we should show the most delicate appreciation of the spirit, and should be careful not to mar the pleasure which our friend has in ministering to us. Even if the thing done is itself something distasteful to us, we owe it to the sentiment prompting it to accept it gracefully and gratefully.
On the other hand, in helping or serving others we need to exercise great wisdom. Many a new growing friendship is hindered by over eagerness to be of use. Favours are pressed with and earnestness that is sincere enough, but indelicate; and the result on our friend is a shrinking from an intimacy which promises to be too urgent. There should be a prudent reserve in all showing of kindness. We should not be too eager – eagerness may seem meddlesomeness. We should not help too soon. Over doing is worse than under doing. We should respect the personality of our friend, and not put him under obligations. Even when there is need for help we may not be the friend who should render it. Relations of helping and serving must be mutual, and we should not seek to outdo our friend in kindness. This would destroy the balance of friendship which must always be maintained if the relations are to be kept free from embarrassment.
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